Becoming the Storm
60 Christmas Wedding
CHRISTMAS WEEK was anything but relaxed. Geoff, Kevin, and Robyn got in on Monday. Tuesday was Rose’s twenty-second birthday. The ranch, the guest rooms, and the local hotels all started to fill as family began to gather for the holiday. Rose’s parents were there for her birthday on Tuesday. Wednesday, the men’s basketball team took their first loss since Thanksgiving. You guessed it. At Kansas. Meanwhile, we watched the Lady Hoosiers trim Eastern Illinois, 62-47.
Most importantly, Wednesday night I took Nikki to the master suite.
“The answer is ‘yes,’ Brian,” Nikki said as we came down from our mutual orgasm. It had been long and sweet, and even tearful at times.
“I didn’t ask a question, Nikki,” I said. I looked lovingly into her eyes and saw something there that had only recently emerged fully. Nikki and I were in love.
“Then please ask. Don’t make me do it, Brian. I love you.” Those words were seldom used between the two of us, but were heartfelt. They were charged with emotion. Emotion always left Nikki on the edge of reality. I’d never heard more emotion in her declaration.
“Nicolette Celeste Duval, will you become my novia? Will you prepare with me to become cónyuge when we can both be here together?”
“I already told you. The answer is ‘yes.’”
We aired out the master suite in the morning and changed all the linen for Mom, Dad, and Anna starting Thursday night. Bill and Crystal got the guest room when Angela said she needed to spend the week in the big bedroom with her family. They were the last of the parents of Casa del Fuego to arrive, except the Gordons, who would drive over early Friday morning. Among the parents who had houses in the Village and the Jacobs family, we had housed all the parents of the casa except Art and Teri, who said they preferred a hotel, and Evelyn and Saul who only lived forty miles away. Thirty parents of my fifteen hearthmates and me.
And on Friday morning when it came time to tape our Holiday Special, every one of us was present dressed in our formal gis.
ELAINE: You can pick your nose and you can pick your seat, but you can’t pick your family. [Aside] Not that I ever picked my nose or my seat! [To audience] I think that only tells part of the story. Sure, there are biological relationships that someone else chooses for us. I guess you can’t pick your parents. At least your first set. They might reproduce without your consent, so you can’t pick your siblings.
I was lucky, I guess. The worst that my parents did was name me after porn star Candy Jones. But you can pick your own name, and I did. Elaine Frost. I invented that. I asked Brian Frost if it was okay to become his sister and after we talked about the implications, we decided second cousins once removed. See? You can even choose what relationship you have.
But most of us have discovered that there are both the family you were born with—or in some cases adopted into—and the family you choose. I want to tell you—and my parents, Fred and Alice Jones, sitting right over there know this—that the family you choose is bound to you as closely as sanguinity. In fact, we all slit our wrists and became blood brothers. Or sisters. Or cousins. Whatever.
[Aside] I’m kidding. We pricked our pinky fingers with a needle. Slitting your wrists makes for a short-term relationship.
I have an unusual chosen family. We call it our casa. I have a cónyuge and fourteen hearthmates. [Aside] Shh! Hercules doesn’t know.
And we have a child. Little Michael Darling is our casa’s baby. Only he’s two years old now! So we’ve got two more in the hopper. I’m kind of grooving on the idea that I get a baby and someone else has to go through labor. I love my cónyuge, but I’m not ready to unstop the tubes just yet.
Talking about family isn’t very funny. But every family has a funny story. There was the time Papa Bart had us all convinced he was an ignorant hillbilly with a still in the mountains instead of a master distiller who makes some of the best Bourbon in Kentucky. Or the time when Papa Rex collected a dollar from each of us and told us we were now represented by an attorney. There was the time Brian caught Anna Mom naked in the kitchen and she told him to get used to it because it was going to be a long, hot summer. Or when Papa Sly told the guys to strip so they could get in the sweat lodge. Didn’t think I knew about that, did you?
We all have our little family stories that bring a smile to our faces. And Christmas, or the winter holidays, when we are all snug in front of the fireplace with our family gathered around us, is when we haul out the memories. Even the painful ones are less so when we share them together. And that is what this holiday is to us.
Today, as guests on Chick Chat, I have the members of my family, Casa del Fuego: my cónyuge and Patrón, Brian Frost; my Matrón, Rose Davis; my incomparable director/producer, Hannah Gordon; my writer and a very funny woman, Nikki Duval; the rest of our hearthmates; and all our parents in the audience. We’re going to have a very happy holiday.
Everyone crammed into the studio Christmas Eve, in spite of the fact that it was crowded with the audience risers taking up so much room. But we managed to fit. We had our toasts and our little rituals. And then we had our clan announcements. It was pretty obvious that Dani was—how did Theresa put it the last time?—twenty-one months pregnant. It was not quite so obvious that Doreen was four months along. None of us knew that Sugar was pregnant with their second.
And we were all speechless when Geoff stood to speak.
“It’s no secret to our cousins that Kevin and I are gay,” Geoff started. “But it might not be as clear that both of us love Robyn. I know that some people thought Robyn was along as a third wheel, but I love this woman.”
“And so do I,” Kevin joined in. “She even lets me borrow her clothes.”
“I love both of you two,” Robyn declared.
“We’ve asked Rose to be our fire guide and bless our union as cónyuge together—the three of us,” Geoff said. Rose stood up beside the three.
“Geoff, Kevin, and Robyn have made their commitments to each other and have declared their love in your presence,” Rose said. “It is with great joy that I wrap this thread around your joined hands in celebration of your commitment to each other. Always remember that it represents your love, not a shackle to hold you where you do not want to be. When your hands part and you break this pink thread, let it be a reminder to you that it is not a ritual or law that holds you together, but your choice and your love.”
I’d never seen a three-way kiss with two guys and a girl. We all applauded.
“That’s not exactly all,” Geoff said. “We want to have a child and there are all kinds of laws and stupid traditions. But we want it to be right in your eyes and in the eyes of our parents and families. So, we’ve asked Rose in her role as an ordained minister to tie another knot for us this evening.”
“Geoff and Robyn, you have already professed your love for each other in front of this gathering. Robyn, do you wish to marry Geoff?”
“Yes, I do,” Robyn said.
“Geoff, do you wish to marry Robyn?”
“Yes, I do,” he answered.
“Kevin, as cónyuge to both Geoff and Robyn, do you support this marriage and wish to see Robyn and Geoff married?”
“Yes. Yes! I do!” he practically screamed.
“By the placing of rings on each other’s fingers, you create an outward and visible sign of your inner commitment to each other. Do you have rings?”
“We do,” Geoff said. Kevin held out the rings for the two and they placed them on each other’s hands.
“Under the laws of the State of Indiana and as recognized throughout the world, I pronounce you husband and wife,” Rose said. Geoff leaned forward and kissed Robyn. We were all stunned. It was so fast and unexpected.
“I got to be a bridesmaid!” Kevin screeched, jumping up and down. That broke us all up and there was applause from the whole tribe.
The rest of the holiday was pretty much a blur. Parents hung around and mostly headed back to work on Monday. Lionel’s team had a holiday tourney on Monday and Tuesday, so a bunch of people went to that. When the Joneses and the Davises went back to Mishawaka, Mom, Dad, and Anna moved over to the Woods’ house. Mom was determined not to leave again until her granddaughter was born and Sylvia was right with her. As soon as they were out of the house, we went into nesting mode. The room was completely changed over and turned into our own private birthing suite. Everything Dani would need was in the room, including a little bassinet that Doreen brought over. All we had to do was wait. I was just hoping our baby was born before the tenth when I had to go back to school.
“I don’t know if I like this,” Samantha said to Dani. “I’ve liked being able to tell you apart from your sisters.” Dani reflexively reached for her jaw and the huge scar there.
“Samantha?” she said. Sam reached up and kissed Dani’s cheek.
“Honey, our scars are invisible to everyone in our household. We don’t see it when we look at you and if something calls our attention to it, we just assume your sisters have one, too. Look. I have this big ragged mark all along my shoulder. Do you ever notice it?” Dani shook her head and bent to kiss Sam’s shoulder. “No. The way I tell you apart from your sisters is this huge baby bump in front of you! When you push our little girl out into the world, I won’t be able to tell which of you is which again!”
We all laughed.
The handfasting of Theresa, Larry, and Dawn was a lot lower key than Geoff’s, though not much longer. The three of them, toting the two little ones, came over to our house on New Year’s Eve. They joined us for a family dinner and then, while Hannah and Doreen held the children, Rose spoke the ritual words and wound tan thread around the wrists of the three. They didn’t attempt a three-way kiss, but Theresa laid a kiss on Dawn that nearly melted the nearby candles. I thought that was pretty hot, but then Dawn flowed into Larry’s arms and the kiss they shared was filled with so much love it made us weep. Larry turned to Theresa and they kissed as deeply and emotionally.
“Are you sure you are okay to watch the kiddies tonight?” Theresa asked Hannah.
“They’ll be fine. Matthew already has Ellie in the guest room. And is showing her where her toothbrush is,” Hannah said. Theresa turned on me.
“If your son knocks up my daughter before she’s sixteen, I will be very upset,” she said sternly.
“I think we’d better make sure they are well informed and understand the rules,” I said. “Those rules saw the rest of us through our tough times. I think they’ll work for the kids if we start telling about them now.” I hugged Theresa.
“I so love being a part of this clan,” she whispered.
“I’m sorry,” Dani moaned. We all turned to look at her and Dawn was by her side in a flash. “I can wait. You need to go with your cónyuge. I’m sure this will pass.”
“Yes, it will pass,” Dawn said. “Just as soon as you have a baby. Brian, your cónyuge needs you to help her to the birthing suite. She’s in labor.”
Oh, Dani!
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