What Were They Thinking?
11 The Ties that Bind
OUR MORNING of post-coital bliss was disrupted. We’d planned on the Gordons and Prices coming for lunch, but not on my daughter arriving with the surprise announcement that she was engaged. Trust Betts to make everything about her.
My head was absolutely spinning and I wanted time to lie in the arms of my lovers and just absorb what we had done. Lovers. I had made love to a woman. I was in love with a woman. And my husband, of course. I had lain next to them and guided my husband’s penis into her vagina! We kissed as they made love. I needed more time to bask in this glow!
Instead, we had luncheon guests. We had a future son-in-law to get to know. We had the preacher to entertain. And we had to watch Anna pack Jennifer and Courtney into the car and follow the Prices back to Kokomo. We’d managed an all-too-brief kiss in the garage before she left, crying at our parting and promising to talk later tonight.
To talk, to plan. To try to arrange our lives so that we could be together without appearing to be forcing our children together.
Still there was Betts, acting more grown-up than I’d ever seen as she and Allen sat at the table with Hayden and me and the Gordons playing pinochle as if she was one of the neighbors and not the daughter who had scoffed at our games for eighteen years!
Eventually, she and Allen left to go meet up with Doreen and others to watch the Rose Bowl. Saul and Evelyn stood to go as well and called for their daughters. Sarah came out of the family room.
“Shh. They’re asleep,” she said. We had to see this. I’d already decided Betts and Allen were not sleeping together in my house, I could scarcely let Brian and Hannah fool around. The four parents went upstairs, none too quietly to find Brian dead to the world in a beanbag chair under the dormer. Hannah lay against him with her arms wrapped around my sleeping son. She looked up at us and motioned us to silence with her finger.
“My boyfriend needs me,” she whispered. “I’m staying here.”
Saul moved quietly to his daughter and kissed her on the head. He whispered to her and she nodded. He turned and motioned us downstairs.
When we were downstairs, I started to apologize and asked what they wanted to do. Saul stopped me.
“Sarah, what happened?” His older daughter struggled to control tears leaking from her eyes.
“Jessica… Jessica broke his heart… again.”
“Oh, my Lord,” I said.
“I don’t know what to do,” Hayden said.
“Neither Brian nor Hannah will behave inappropriately,” Sarah continued. “Brian proved that last night.”
Saul nodded and glanced at Evelyn.
“They’ll be okay if you don’t mind,” he said. “I’ll see if I can talk to them after they deliver papers in the morning.”
“I’m going to pick them up and drive them,” Sarah said.
Between the dating group, basketball, and trying to be a good mother in planning Betts’ wedding, time was precious. I took her back to West Lafayette on the thirteenth to be ready for classes on Wednesday. As soon as I kicked her out of the car—figuratively, of course—I pressed the accelerator and headed east. As near east as I could go. I had to wind back to Delphi before I could hit a pretty straight shot on Indiana 18 across to Kokomo and into the arms of my lover. My breath caught at the thought that I had a lover, but my heart stopped completely when I saw her. So beautiful.
I felt like a teenager, barely into the privacy of her home before our lips were pressed together, held tightly to each other’s bosom. My God! If our children are behaving like this, we will all be grandparents in a year! We forced ourselves to slow down amidst talk of how much we missed each other and how the wedding plans were progressing and what our children were up to. Anna served me a cup of coffee in the kitchen as we sat to talk, but our hands constantly reached to touch each other.
At long last, she took my hand and led me to the bedroom. We simply weren’t going to do anything else today until we’d made love.
And then everything stopped.
We had held each other and made love to each other on New Year’s Eve. But Hayden had been with us. This was the first time that I was consciously about to undress with a woman and take her as my lover. I was near to hyperventilation. I was excited and frightened and nearly ready to flee. I think I would have it Anna had let go of my hand.
“My sweet, sweet lover,” she whispered as she peppered my face with little kisses. “Let’s just lie down and catch our breath. Oh, Marilyn, please don’t run from me.” How could I ignore her plea? We kicked off our shoes and just lay down on the bed next to each other, still holding hands and talking about meaningless things. Trying to let our heads catch up to our hearts. Eventually, there were little kisses and then little touches. Before long, we were lying next to each other in only our bras and panties. As our hands explored and touched each other, soon the bras were gone and my bare breasts were once again pressed against the breasts of this beautiful woman. I adored her with my hands and mouth and accepted her adoration. Her tongue on my nipples sent shivers down my spine and all the way to the soles of my feet.
She worked her way down to my waist and pulled my very practical panties down, planting a kiss on my mons. I clenched my stomach muscles as the implication of her kissing me there fully dawned on me. If she… I should… Can I… I want… I pulled her up to my face to kiss her again.
“Anna, we’ve never done this before with just the two of us. I want to give you oral and I want to receive it from you. I can’t just lie back and let you have me without reciprocating. It’s not that I think I’d owe you, but I can’t stand the thought of not having you wrapped in my arms while I receive that much joy from you.”
“I guess that’s the awkward part of making love with anything but our fingers. Marilyn, I just caught your scent as I pulled your panties down and it made me want to bury my face between your legs. I would do this for you with no thought of receiving the same. But… I mean… If you want… We could do it at the same time.”
Well, that’s one of those awkward moments when you finish getting out of your panties and then have to turn around on the bed and figure out how the pieces fit together and who gets the top and how to lick another woman and feeling the touch of a tongue in your secret place and burying your face to inhale the sweet fragrance of your lover and touching her sensitive bud with the tip of your tongue and…
Oh, God! I just came on Anna’s tongue!
We’re women of a certain age. We don’t just spend all our time in bed having sex. Not after the first couple of hours. When we put on robes and sat with tea in the living room, leaning against each other on the loveseat, the conversation was more relaxed. Oh, I was certainly anticipating the next round of loving my beautiful mistress, but we could talk about simple things without feeling rushed. Instead of forcing foreplay, we let afterglow transition easily into the next round of lovemaking. We showered and went out to dinner. We bought a bottle of wine and went home to toast each other, tasting the fragrant liquid on each other’s tongue. And at night it was an easy transition from a phone call with Hayden, during which he listened to us as we made love again, to a peaceful sleep, held in each other’s arms.
“I love you, Anna.”
“I love you, Marilyn.”
“We love you, Hayden.”
Of course, Hayden and I both wanted to go see Anna but we had a teenager at home. Someone had to stay here.
“You need to visit Anna this week,” I said. “Hayden, she needs to see you as much as she needs to see me.”
“I can’t do that without you, Marilyn. It would be like cheating on you and I swore I’d never do that again.”
I slapped him.
“How dare you compare our relationship with Anna with cheating?” I yelled. We were both stunned and I immediately wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down so I could kiss where the slap still stung. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, my love. I didn’t mean to hit you. Oh, Hayden, I love you so much. But don’t you see? If you think of this as cheating, then I can only consider it an affair. Did I cheat on you when I saw her last week? Please tell me you love her like I love her and this is not just an affair.”
“It’s not an affair, love,” he said as he kissed me and let the kiss deepen. “It’s something I want to last the rest of our lives. I just… I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to tell my wife I have another wife. I don’t know how to tell my son he has another mother.”
I burst out laughing. “Forget about telling your daughter that!” The tension was broken and we both laughed and kissed some more. “How are we going to get you to our lover?”
“My new position in the company includes coordinating with some of our suppliers. There’s a parts supplier in Indianapolis that my boss suggested I go see and tour their plant just to let them know that we are watchful about the quality of parts coming in. I could try to set up the trip next week and plan to spend the night. Would that work?”
“Let’s call Anna! Just remember it has to be Monday or Tuesday when the girls are at Bill and Crystal’s house.”
And so it came about that I sent my husband off to spend the night with another woman. I was thrilled!
“The girls have been begging me to bring them down for this county basketball tournament your son and their ‘other boyfriends’ are playing in,” Anna laughed as we chatted one night. “What would you say to having three more girls in your house next weekend?”
“Three?” Hayden asked. Wake up, honey!
“You didn’t think I’d stay home, did you?”
“Oh. Yes! I was just… stupid.”
“I hope we didn’t sate each other so thoroughly Tuesday that you don’t want to see me again so soon.”
“No. I mean…”
“Hayden, shut up and say yes,” I said. “Anna how can we arrange this so you can be with us but there aren’t so many people in the house that we can’t be together?”
The kids would be surprised when the girls came down for the tournament, even though they’d only come for Saturday’s games and have to go home Sunday. That’s the problem with kids in different school districts and different counties. Different calendars. While our kids were off for semester break, Jennifer and Courtney were still in school.
We organized a picnic for the team on Saturday and figured that if they didn’t win their Friday night game we’d hold the picnic at the church Saturday instead. Lily Cortales agreed to invite the girls for a sleepover with Samantha Saturday night, so as long as Brian was sufficiently exhausted to go straight to bed after we all got home from the game, we would be able to enjoy ourselves.
The plan worked flawlessly. Brian’s team had the good grace to win Friday night, so we gathered to feed the team after their game on Saturday. We collected all the boys and girls in the agreement who weren’t on the team and took them to the game while the mothers set up the picnic in the cafeteria.
The coach was surprised and pleased that we’d brought food for his team. He was also surprised to see the rest of the boyfriends and girlfriends, but he let it go with a good sense of humor. It was obvious to all of us that this giant of a man was a good influence on our kids.
After some clever arrangements that involved Jennifer and Courtney going home with Samantha and Brian calling us to let us know when the bus was leaving after the game, Anna and I followed Hayden home.
We were sorely tempted to jump right in bed but we are adults and are driven by things other than our hormones. Anna and I piled on top of Hayden in his big recliner and cuddled up.
“I’ve missed you so much,” Anna sighed after a long sweet kiss. “I know we talk almost every night, but I miss being held and holding both of you. I love having you visit me for the night, but I want both of you.”
“That’s how I feel about you,” Hayden said. “I loved every minute we were together last week…” he glanced at me and I nodded. “I love you. I loved making love with you. But I still missed these lips when we were together and yours when we are apart.” He kissed me softly. “I love you, Marilyn.”
“We’re in a difficult position, but we are adults,” I said. “You’re very romantic, Hayden, but I know you didn’t think twice about me when you were in Anna’s arms. I know that because I didn’t think twice about you when I was in them. And Anna, you know Hayden and I make love when you aren’t with us. It’s very difficult to spare a thought for you when Hayden is coming in me.” We all laughed and agreed. “But we want to be all together as often as possible. That’s where being adults comes in. Brian, Jennifer, Courtney… They can’t just jump in the car and drive down to meet each other when they want to. Granted, we have restrictions. I don’t think it would be good to let the kids know that we’re involved just yet. And we have jobs. But we have cars, telephones, and we pay our own bills. We have options.”
“There’s an option I’d like to exercise right now,” Anna said. “Before there’s a chance that we’ll be interrupted by responsibilities.” She pulled both Hayden’s and my faces to hers. It was a little awkward but once we figured out what she was trying to do, Hayden and I got into making it work as well. For the first time, we managed to all three tangle our tongues together as we petted and stroked each other.
“Let’s move this to the bedroom. We only have about three more hours before we have to go pick up the son.”
We made things work. We weren’t able to be together as often as we wanted. We had children and our house had become meeting central on Saturdays. I was concerned and checked on the ‘study group’ upstairs frequently, bringing snacks and drinks. The kids who came to the group studied. And all of them showed positive results. I checked with the other parents to make sure. I got glowing reports of improved grades and better attitudes since the kids started their group.
So, we rewarded them. We provided transportation for dates. Took the kids to ball games, and sometimes drove the hundred miles to and from Kokomo when the kids were involved with both JV and Varsity games followed by a dance. We had to be sure to be home in time for our children’s midnight curfew, but we succeeded.
We got caught. It was inevitable. But not as bad as I first feared. The boys’ varsity team won the semi-state in a surprise upset. Hayden spent all Sunday morning organizing a fan bus to the state finals the next Saturday. Of course, that involved phone calls to all the parents and when we got around to calling Anna, we made the call from the bedroom. One thing led to another and Hayden was between my legs generating wonderful feelings with his tongue while I tried to talk Anna through the same feelings on the phone.
“Mom! I’m going to bake,” Brian called from the kitchen. Oh, dear! We’d lost track of time and Brian had finished cleaning the barn. He was in the house while we were having three-way phone sex!
“In a minute, Brian. We’ll be out in a minute,” Hayden snapped back as he lifted his face from my crotch. We froze and listened to make sure he didn’t pick up the kitchen extension. Instead, we heard the kitchen door slam.
Well, that was a bit of a mood killer. We ended our phone call with all three of us a little frustrated. Hayden checked outside and discovered Brian’s bicycle was gone. We fidgeted around, made coffee, and I almost decided to start bread baking myself but didn’t want Brian to think he was shirking. It was half an hour later when he came into the house hot and sweaty. Damn it! We could have finished.
“Where were you, honeybunch? I thought you were going to bake bread,” I said as pleasantly as I could manage.
“Sorry, Mom. I… uh… suddenly realized I hadn’t been exercising since basketball season ended, so I went for a bike ride.”
“Oh. I see. Exercise.” My son must have realized that he interrupted us and ran off to give us more privacy. I couldn’t remember the last time one of our children had caught us having sex. He probably thought we had been celibate for the past fifteen years!
“I… I’m sorry, Mom. I didn’t mean… I mean… I coulda gone to Geoff’s or something. Or Timbuktu.” I needed to grab this bull by the horns. I looked him straight in the eye and walked toward him. “Please have mercy!”
“It’s your fault, young man,” I growled. “We do our best not to get embarrassed by your… cavorting with your girlfriends. You’ll just have to do your best to keep from being embarrassed by your father and me cavorting as a result. It’s been… inspirational. Pretty gross to think of your old parents having sex, isn’t it?”
“It’s not that, Mom, honest! I just felt so bad that I interrupted. I’m glad that you and Dad love each other and I hope…” tears sprang to his eyes. “I hope I have someone who loves me and cavorts with me when I’m your age.” Oh, no. Teenage hormones at work. I was so thankful Hayden was there. He scooped our son up in his arms and carried him to the sofa where we hugged as a family. Hayden took the lead and correctly assumed that it wasn’t about us.
“Tell us about it, son,” he said. “Is it Jessica?”
Never let it be said that our son isn’t emotional. He wept as he poured out his soul to us. And all we could do was comfort him. Sixteen girlfriends and he still mourned the loss of his guardian angel.
Easter weekend we had another sleepover. This time, seven of Brian’s girlfriends showed up, including Jennifer and Courtney. As soon as they got there, there was a lot of squealing and hugging and kissing.
“Remember the rules,” Anna said.
“We signed the agreement.”
“My rules,” Anna clarified. “No fewer than five of you for the sleepover. Everyone stays dressed in proper pajamas. Brian bakes bread in the morning.”
“Way to lay down the law, Anna,” I laughed. I was comfortable with the guest list. Brian, Jennifer, Courtney, Samantha, and Hannah had spent a weekend together at the dude ranch last fall and all came out relatively unscathed. It had been that weekend that allowed us to entertain Anna at our home the first time. I was certain that adding Sarah, Rose, and Whitney to the mix would calm things even further. Sarah and Whitney were almost as socially reserved as Hannah and Rose was emerging as a real leader within the group. As soon as we’d had lunch, of course, the kids headed for the barn. They were no more than out the door than Anna and I pushed Hayden into his chair and piled on top for some serious kissing. With the group that would be here tonight, I was pretty sure once they moved upstairs, no one would come back down. We’d wait a respectable time to be sure, but the three of us didn’t plan on getting much sleep tonight.
“I think the girls suspect something,” Anna whispered.
“Really?”
“It’s just knowing winks or comments that could be taken two ways. I’m not sure what clued them in. It might have been the phone bill.”
“Oh, my! We do talk on the phone a lot.”
“We’ve always known we wouldn’t keep it a secret forever,” Hayden said. “I don’t think Brian is clued in but with the girls out in the barn with him right now, I’d guess anything they suspect will be discussed with him. I’ve been trying to prepare him for the discovery.”
“How?”
“Well, a few weeks ago there was a story in the Sunday paper about the gay man who was murdered in Minneapolis. For one thing, it pissed me off. Pure and simple hate crime. But Brian was in the kitchen making cinnamon rolls for breakfast and I used the opportunity to talk to him about what consenting adults do being no one’s business but their own. I compared it to the explicit permission clause in their agreement.”
“What was his response?” Anna asked.
“He said, ‘Dad, I’m not gay.’ I shook my head and said, ‘No. You just have twenty boyfriends and girlfriends. And within the realm of what is appropriate for fifteen and sixteen-year-olds, that is nobody’s business but your own.’ I think he understood.”
“We need to start preparing them to find out for sure,” I said. “Anna, this isn’t temporary as far as I’m concerned. If you don’t think we can handle the kids knowing and want out, you need to say so soon. It’s almost too late for me to let you go.”
“It is too late, Marilyn. Darlings, my Hayden and my Marilyn, I love you. I want to be with you always.”
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