Pussy Pirates
Chapter 20
Month 133—January on Anouilh
“ST. JEANNE D’ARC is now within transporter range,” Ubie said.
“Any sign of interest yet?” I asked.
“While no comments or contact has been made, we must assume the AIs have been tracking our progress. A scout followed us out of the asteroid belt, but turned away when we crossed the orbital plane of Mars. There have been a number of soft pings from various ships as we have moved nearer the orbital plane of Luna. As soon as crew is aboard, we will contact Earthat control to inform it of our intended station. Our current trajectory would appear to be no more than a fly-by until we course correct to take up our station,” Ubie responded.
“But we can move up now?” I asked.
“Before the order is given, I need to activate life support systems. It will take three hours seventeen minutes to activate all systems and run complete system checks. At your command.”
“I think this is a command decision that needs to be made by the Captain. What is her current location?”
“She is with her bridge crew in the simulator.”
“I guess it’s time for the big reveal. I’ll transport to the bridge simulator.”
My arrival on the bridge was a surprise to everyone.
“Permission to come aboard, Captain?”
“Boss! Welcome. What brings you to St. Jeanne d’Arc?” I walked to the front of the bridge and faced the dozen crew on duty.
“Congratulations, crew. You passed. Turn up the lights, Ubie.” The controls on the various stations went dark and general lighting came up. Gravity increased gradually to Earth standard.
“What’s the meaning of this, Boss?” Dakota was grinning at me, unable to keep a straight face as I revealed the big ‘secret.’
“Captain, you and your crew have gone through the most extensive training program of any crew we know of in history. For two years, you have worked together, drilled, and practiced for every contingency on this ship. But is there any one of you who hasn’t realized that this has been a game simulator and that the AI has been throwing task after task at you to get you ready for the real thing? The top levels of the hotel were rebuilt from the inside out to create an exact replica of the real bridge. Based on your training and what we’ve learned from it, some modifications were made to the St. Jeanne while it was still under construction in the asteroid belt and too far away for us to transport to.”
“And the Hawks?” Captain asked.
“One floor below us. They’ll all be landing shortly and then we’ll have to debrief our fifty-one fighter pilots. I’ve got to tell you, they are amazing.”
“So, what’s the reason you are stopping our training? We’ve been live with gamers the whole time.” I tried to keep up with the names of all the citizens of Anouilh, but I was still struggling with some. I raised an eyebrow at her. “Oh. I’m Eve.”
“Thank you for the reminder, Eve. I’ll try to remember next time. I’m interrupting now because the ship is finished. We’re ready to actually occupy the St. Jeanne d’Arc and you’ll be able to crawl around the whole ship. It set off from our shipyard in the asteroid belt two months ago and has been drifting toward us since then. It has just reached transporter range at approximately 400,000 kilometers. Captain, I’m ready to turn over the keys to your new home.”
The bridge was silent for a few seconds and I was afraid this had actually come as a shock to them. Dakota had been in on it from the first.
“You’re right, Boss. Being in a simulator has been one of the worst kept secrets in the universe, but we knew how important it was to maintain the fiction. If for nothing else, then for the game. We’ve been at this for two years, and I for one, am ready to see what the rest of my ship looks like.” She raised her fist in the air and the crew shouted.
“St. Jeanne!”
The scene was repeated as the Hawk pilots arrived in the briefing room. And the response was much the same.
“I’ve gotta tell you, though, the scenes Ubie has been playing for us are so realistic and believable, there were times I didn’t want to quit flying,” KC said. “Will it really get better when we’re up there?”
“It will be a little different,” I explained, “but not a lot. We’re going to go up there and you are going to control the craft. As much as possible, everything else is going to be identical to what you have practiced on. You’ll be flying a pretty ugly cannon. But your control ship will look mostly like what you’ve been used to. You’ll be flying the Hawks remotely from your cockpit. But you really will be in zero grav. The simulation might not be perfect on that. Otherwise, it will be like having the cockpit on the flight deck while the rest of your bird is a thousand miles away. There will still be some adjustments to be made. The ships you’ve been using here on Anouilh will now be turned over to the next class of pilots.”
“Why have you made such a big deal about building Hawks that look so sexy and making us go to the fake flight deck and all. Couldn’t we have done all that with a controller and virtual display in our rooms?” Misty asked.
“What fun would that be?” I laughed. “No. Really, part of our overall strategy involves the pilots you’ve been training through the game. Some—perhaps many—of them will end up piloting craft like you do. But they will only have the virtual controllers. Honestly, we don’t know how effective they’ll be. They still think of it as playing the game. We have a reputation of having the most immersive game platform in the world. But there are still a few thousand players who only log on to watch your pretty pussies open and lubricate while you’re flying. I have to say, I sometimes get lost in the feed from your capsules. You are very sexy ladies.”
“So, when can we go aboard?” Rainbow asked.
“When the Captain gives the order to activate the life support systems, we’ll prepare for crew boarding. It will take three hours and seventeen minutes before the ship is ready and all systems have been checked. You have that time to return to your rooms and pack what you want on board. No children will go up on this first mission. You’ll have a few weeks before we’re satisfied that our station is secure. During that time, and even after we’re all settled, there will be time available to transport back here to the resort for breaks. Your logistics officers will coordinate that so the ship is always staffed and ready to go to battle stations. For now, though, this is our adjustment period to actually get used to living aboard St. Jeanne d’Arc and making the ship your new home. Captain?”
“This is the Captain to Joan,” Dakota said.
“I hear you Captain,” the ship responded. She had a mellow voice that would calm anyone.
“Joan, activate the life support systems and prepare for crew boarding. Inform Earthat command of our intended course to our station.”
“Yes, Captain. Life support systems powering on.”
“Bridge Crew Prima. You will be the first to board with me in three hours and seventeen minutes. After we are satisfied that all systems are checked and condition green, Bridge Crew Secunda will transport. Pilots and tech crew, you will board next. Joan will show you to your quarters and we will have a crew briefing in the main mess at 1800 hours. Joan, will we have food aboard?”
“Organic material to feed the replicators has been prepared and Anouilh support staff will begin transporting it as soon as the systems are all online. While it is not a full stock, there will be adequate raw materials for the menu you have requested for tonight. Additional organics will continue to be transported to the replicator for the next four weeks until tanks are filled. Transport of water will also commence and be purified. Inorganic materials have been stocked from the asteroid belt but a few resources will still be transported. The transport of these materials will be handled by the crew at Atlantic Basin Station.”
“Very well. I expect everyone to find the main mess by 1800. Dismissed.”
“This is it, guys,” Starry Eyes said to her cam. “All this time, we’ve been playing the game and transporting to our Hawks for a few hours and then back to our homes. Today, we’re headed up to the St. Jeanne d’Arc for good. Our rooms have been prepared according to the plans you helped put together. We’ll be out there just short of the distance of the Earth to the moon when we get parked and stable. That means I’m packing up my room on Earth and moving to the ship as my full-time residence. My computer and camera equipment are all I have left to pack, but I’ll have a remote feed as I go. I have no idea what going through the transporter does to my camera signal, but you’ll see whatever I see as I head to my new quarters. You’re coming with me, baby!”
The tip chimes rang in the chatroom and Starry Eyes read the message.
“Thank you so much, Bilbo Fappins. Yes, my tips will continue to accumulate in my account here on Earth. And that’s important, guys. The Pussy Pirates are not leaving Earth’s sphere of influence. That’s what the boss calls it. We’re deploying to our space. We’re not headed off to hunt dickheads or colonize a new world. We’re here to protect Earth. Here’s where we’re staying. We’ll be closer to Earth than the moon is. Okay. I’m switching to handheld and pushing my stuff to the departure point. Wish me luck!”
For the first time, the pilots and crew were all dressed in flight suits that consisted of more than their skin. The uniform had been suggested to make the transfer more real than going directly to the flight deck. When she got to the ship, Starry Eyes figured they’d all be naked again soon. She pointed the camera around the departure room to pick up the other women who were chatting and waiting for their turn to be called. The bridge crew had been transported first and the pilots were ready to follow.
“Alpha Flight—Misty, Pixie, and Babycakes—you are clear to transport to St. Jeanne d’Arc. Push your luggage sled onto Platform 9 ¾ and follow it through.” There was a lot of giggling as Misty led the way, pushing her luggage sled ahead of her. She wore a Gryffindor scarf with her flight suit. All the triads had adopted some mascot or team name. Everyone had agreed on Harry Potter’s Platform 9 ¾ as their departure designation. Starry Eyes was in Rho flight, the most recent graduates of pilot school. She’d be the last pilot through the transporter with designation APP-051. Her flight had nicknamed themselves ‘The Lion, the Witch, and the War Room.’ She had a stuffed lion riding her shoulder.
“Rho flight—Marcy, White Witch, Starry Eyes—you are clear to transport. Push your luggage sled onto Platform 9 ¾ and follow it through.”
“Here we go,” Starry Eyes said to her camera. “I’m so excited.” She pushed her sled onto the pad and followed it through. There were only a few moments hesitation in the feed before she was live again. “Wow, this is different,” she said as she panned the camera around the transporter room. Her two flight mates were pushing their sleds toward a hatch in the fairly small receiving room. “It still throws me a little when I come from Earth standard gravity to two-thirds gravity on the ship. I feel so light and airy. Always before, we arrived directly on the flight deck where our Hawks are. Now we’re in the heart of the ship. We’ve studied the diagrams, but I have no idea what to expect when I get to my room. They just told us to specify what we wanted and that we’d like our new quarters. I mean, what’s not to like? We’ve spent the past few years living in glorified hotel rooms. I can’t imagine this could be any worse.”
The camera pointed down the hall and at a hatch on the right. It wasn’t numbered like the hotel rooms, but more like an office. The plaque on the door said ‘APP-051 Starry Eyes.” She opened the door.
“Oh. Nice!” she said as she pushed the sled into the room. “It’s like I dreamed of.” Over the past several weeks, all the women had been interviewed extensively regarding the kind of quarters they would like. Starry Eyes had suggested something along the lines of a thatched roof beach hut but with more modern conveniences. The theme had been carried out, but she had five rooms and comfortable furnishings. One wall was an open view of the ocean, much like she’d had from some places on Anouilh. “Joan, can I have motion and sound for my exterior view?”
“Certainly, Starry Eyes. Do you want a normal progression of light and dark to match Anouilh?”
“Oh yes, please.” The picture on the wall began to move like a paused video and the sound of waves lapping at the shore. There was an occasional birdcall. “Joan, this is lovely. Is it a live picture or a simulation? I can’t tell.”
“This is a recording from the location on San Pedro Island, Belize that you requested. Many days have been recorded, so you will have daily variety, much as you would have on the island. Your room is being maintained at a temperature of twenty-four degrees Celsius, but you can adjust up or down to your comfort.”
“Thank you, Joan. Am I still broadcasting?”
“Affirmative.”
“Okay, guys. Thank you for joining me on my little trip this afternoon. I’m not going to show you the entire apartment at once, but believe me, you’ll see me stretched out naked on my bit of sandy beach here soon. Maybe we can make love tonight. Right now, though, I need to unpack and set things up before I go to dinner at 1800 hours. Oh, and if you’re confused, we’re maintaining Eastern Standard Time like we do on Anouilh, so we can stay coordinated with our home base. I’ll log in again at 2000 hours and tell you all about dinner. See you then!” She cut the feed to her webcam.
“Is it real, Joan? Are we really on the ship?”
“You are presently aboard the St. Jeanne d’Arc, slightly less than 400,000 kilometers from Earth and drifting toward our polar station. We are forty degrees above the ecliptic, but as we approach our station, we will be directly above the North Pole. That is ninety degrees above the ecliptic at an altitude of 200,000 kilometers.”
“Home sweet home. I guess I should get settled in before dinner.”
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