Becoming the Storm
Part IV: Beyond the Storm
62 Little One
WE SLEPT the remainder of the night bracketed by Hannah and Samantha. Xan, as we decided to call her, had been cleaned up, fed again, and put in the bassinet. Sometime around 4:30 in the morning, I felt a little whisper in my ear. Hannah got up and brought Xan to bed with us. She suckled for a while and then went back to sleep. For the rest of the night, she lay cuddled on my chest with one little fist wrapped around Dani’s finger. Our bed was toasty warm.
Dani felt fine, so after we had all showered together, including Xan, we actually went downstairs early in the afternoon. With Lily added into the mix, we had four mothers smothering us with attention. And three sisters, three dads, all our casa and a few little ones. Hannah was being run ragged with six kids to chase after. Of course, the two babies didn’t require much chasing. But who could resist paying attention?
Maddie had gone through the process of acquiring a baby brother and was rather bossy over Matthew and Ellie. She was the oldest and therefore, in charge. Oh boy! Shades of Betts. Matthew had been a little jealous of Ellie when she got a baby sister. He was pretty pleased that now he had a baby sister, too. There were plenty of pictures taken with Dani, Doreen, my two children, and me. Elaine, Liz, Mary, and Nikki had tackled the kitchen while everyone else was scrambling after children and waiting a turn to hold Xan. They served an incredible oyster stew that Nikki declared was a New England tradition.
When dinner was finished, Dani and Xan were exhausted and were led up to bed by her sisters. My sister pushed me back into my big chair and settled on my lap. The rest of the family and casa were still around. Bart had finally pulled out a celebratory bottle of Triple Crown. He, Sly, Dad, and Josh were the primary imbibers, though I noticed the four moms toasting each other, too.
Betts sat on my lap and stared into my eyes. I waited to see what it was that she wanted. We’d had time to talk a little since she got there on Christmas Eve. I was pretty certain we’d passed the stage where she wanted to kill me for having gotten shot last spring. I know, but that makes sense to Betts. When she’d visited in the summer, she simply couldn’t talk about it. We’d gone for a ride with her on Rika and me on Toby as we talked. But now she simply looked into my eyes as if she would find some secret buried in my soul.
Then she kissed me. It was a very unsisterly kiss.
“If I hadn’t decided that I would only have two children, you would father the third,” she said as she hugged me. No one seemed to have noticed her display of affection.
“That would kind of involve…”
“Hush. I know what it would involve. It’s not that repulsive,” she giggled. “I don’t lust after you, Brian. Kissing you didn’t make my panties wet. But you are the strongest, bravest, most caring and loving, intelligent, and thoughtful man I have ever met. A woman wants that to be passed to her children. Every woman in your household wants that. Maybe in the whole clan. What I want you to know is that I see it in you. I wish that I had been able to see that strength of character when we were growing up. I know we’ve put that behind us. We’ve forgiven each other for being brats. I just want you to know that I’ve gone a step beyond that and I see you for the incredible human being that you are. Not a brother or a television star or a hero. Simply an incredible human being. And I love you.”
“I love you, Betts. And I don’t think you have to worry about my traits being passed to your children. We come from the same gene pool, you and I. Perhaps you struggled in a different way than I did, but you have turned into a wonderful sister and mother,” I said.
“Thank you. All I have to do now is keep Madeline from becoming a Betts junior to her brother. She’s a bossy little bitch.”
“I wouldn’t worry too much. Look,” I said, pointing to where the four older children were playing together. While we watched, the three younger children all stepped up and hugged Maddie. I’m sure it had something to do with what they were playing, but it was a genuine affection among them. The kids were fine.
“I’ll try to be back when Dor is ready to deliver again. Take care of the family.”
I stayed in the chair most of the evening, but every so often I had to get up and go check on Dani and Xan. They were resting, but not always asleep. Just checking on them made me more comfortable. Of course, there was always at least one member of the clan or family with them. I made sure to kiss my lover and daughter on every trip.
In the big chair, my cónyuge, novia, and compañera all took turns snuggling with me.
“I love seeing you in your green gi,” I whispered.
“My father was shocked, I tell you. Shocked,” Nikki giggled.
“What about your mother?”
“She just rolled her eyes.”
“Don’t you just hate it when parents do that. I thought it was supposed to be the kids who rolled their eyes,” I laughed.
“I think she started it about the same time I did. Only I grew out of it,” Nikki agreed.
“Ah. Mockery is the highest form of flattery, they say.”
“You mock me! And I will not be mocked!” We laughed, cuddled, and kissed a little.
“How is the novel coming?” I asked. I noted that even though Nikki hates morning, she always reserved the first two hours after she got up to sequester herself and write.
“Okay. I have her up to her senior year in high school and her first boyfriend. Presumably he is her boyfriend. She alternately loves him and hates him. I think she has killed him and marked up a rose three times so far,” Nikki said. “Erin read the first fifty pages and assigned me to a critique group where I have to share what I’ve written. One by one, each member of the group has been killed by Sharon. She has an entire wall of black roses.”
“It sounds obvious that she just imagines killing all these people,” I said.
“It is, until one of them turns up dead.”
“Oh shit!”
“No kidding. But did she do it? Or just imagine she did?”
“I have to go to work,” Angela said.
“I wish you didn’t have to go in on a holiday,” I answered. Her work was at Methodist Hospital and I had a feeling she would be emptying bedpans all night.
“At least I didn’t have to work New Year’s Eve,” she said. “Mom did and it wasn’t pretty. She’s an emergency room nurse. You would not believe the bizarre injuries in a college town on New Year’s Eve.”
“Yeah. I suppose she sees everything that happens right after, ‘Hold my beer and watch this.’ We can be pretty stupid at times.”
“It beats seeing your daughter’s lovers come in riddled with bullet holes.” I looked at Angela. Dinita had been on duty after the shooting? Why did I never know this?
“I should visit your mom,” I said. “Thank her.”
“Why do you think your parents have stayed at her house so often the past several months? Don’t push it, Brian. I only just found out no one had told you she was in the emergency room when you were brought in,” Angela said. “I know I’ve been a little distant this fall because of school and all, but I do still love you. No matter what. Each time I empty a bedpan I remind myself that someone did that for you.”
“I love you, Angela. It’s somehow comforting to know that emptying bedpans reminds you of me.” She looked at me and sputtered out a laugh. We kissed and she hustled out the door.
“Tomorrow and Monday are still holidays,” Courtney whispered in my ear.
“Dad once said a holiday was a day you didn’t have to wear a tie to the office,” Jennifer said. “Poor Brian still has to do his first show of the New Year.”
“Ah. That has been taken care of,” I said. “The alternate Woods have given me the week off to be with my new family member. Speaking of which…”
“You just came back downstairs,” Courtney said, pushing me back. “Don’t worry, lover. We get the next shift tending to the mommy and baby, so we’ll go up with you when it’s time. We love you.”
“And I love you,” I said. I kissed first Courtney and then Jennifer. Then the three of us tangled our tongues together as I held my cónyuge. “Hannah has declared a Casa Holiday for Monday,” I finally continued. “Maggie is directing Monday’s show. Believe it or not, Amber is stepping in for Elaine. It should be very interesting. She has the right kind of outgoing personality to be able to handle it.”
“Is she funny?”
“She has good material. I think this will be perfect for her. It might even put her on track for the kind of career she wants. Who knows?”
“Then can you spend a little of your time off playing with our little pussies? We miss you so much, Brian.”
“I cannot think of anything I’d rather do after I hold my new baby and her mom than to play with your little pussies. Or anything else you’d like played with,” I added as I lightly patted Courtney’s bottom.
Monday night, after considerable convincing on the part of my lovers and even a little push from my daughter, I went to the finals of the Hoosier Classic. The Lady Hoosiers had done well against Yale the night before and I knew Whitney was a little disappointed that I didn’t attend the game, even though she said she understood.
I think when I told Whitney I’d be there for the game Monday night that her energy level went up about ninety percent. It was her last season playing basketball and was something we had shared since we were freshmen in high school.
And she checked to make sure I was there before the game against Eastern Kentucky got started. She absolutely drove her teammates from her position as point guard. She called the plays, but she also took the shots when it was appropriate. She nailed five three-pointers during the game and hit two free throws to lead the team in scoring with seventeen. They rolled over Eastern Kentucky 84-64.
When we got home, Whitney crawled in bed with Dani and me. We made gentle love and Dani touched and kissed both of us. Whitney fell asleep while she was still partially on top of me. Elaine was on duty to bring us the baby in the middle of the night.
“I’m sure you realize that she is very tiny, especially for a mother as tall as you,” our pediatrician said. “And she’s had the usual post-birth weight loss. It’s not critical. According to your midwife’s certificate, she’s only lost three ounces, but for a baby this small that is a lot.”
“We knew she’d be small,” I volunteered. “Her first two months in the womb, Danielle was on a liquid diet. Her jaw was… broken and wired shut.”
“Mmm. Yes. I know we talked about that in our get-acquainted session a month ago. Danielle, I’d say you are still a little thinner than your optimum. Did you regain all your weight?” she asked. Dani shook her head.
“I gained weight steadily after I could start eating solid foods, but I guess most of it was baby weight. I’m still a little under what I weighed before I got pregnant,” Dani said.
“Well, here is my concern. Little Lexi is healthy, but she needs more.”
“Uh… Please…” I said. “Alexandra is named after a dear, sweet young woman, but it is painful to call her Lexi. Please use Xan. It’s really very important to us.”
“Alexandra? Cortales? The young woman who was… Oh, dear! You poor things. Why ever didn’t you tell me about that to start? Your record from your obstetrician did not say this was caused by a gunshot!” she said, stroking Dani’s jaw. I thought I was going to see our pediatrician break down in tears. “I didn’t mean to give you more pain. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Dani said. She took the pediatrician’s hand and placed it on Xan’s head. “We just want to raise a wonderful, healthy baby. Tell us what we should do.” That little movement was enough to settle the pediatrician back into her professional mode.
“The concern is that you probably can’t supply enough milk to meet Xan’s needs and to gain back the weight that you need. I’m afraid that one or both of you will be malnourished. I’m old school and I believe in breastfeeding and natural childbirth and all the things you’ve done so far. But I believe that you need to supplement your breastmilk so that both you and Xan can gain weight and strength. I am not in favor of the popular baby formulas. They have been shown repeatedly to cause more harm than good. Babies are often very sensitive to cow’s milk. Do you have access to goat milk? They sell it at Bloomingfoods, the natural foods coop. There are several different recipes available for feeding with goat milk and the only thing I would caution you against is sweetening with high fructose corn syrup. That pretty much cancels out the benefit of not using formula,” she said.
“Our neighbor is one of the suppliers for the coop,” I said.
“Then your neighbor must be certified. In that case, the fresher the goat milk the better. Don’t store large quantities and don’t get the pasteurized version. Give it to your baby raw and whole. It won’t take a lot to supplement what you are providing, Danielle. Remember we aren’t trying to replace what you give your baby. Just give her a little extra. I’d like to see you again in two weeks, and I prefer to make the second a home visit. Can we set up a time?”
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