Foolish Wisdom
Part I: Summertime
1 Wedding Blues
BETTS THE BITCH struck at five. News at ten.
I thought I’d be nice and make bread for Betts and her girlfriend from college that was coming with her. Turned out it was three girlfriends and Doreen arrived five minutes later.
“Brian, we need your room this week,” Betts announced to me. “There’s too many of us to sleep in my room.”
“You’re just going to take over my room? No asking or anything? Why should I give you my room?”
“Because I need it. I’m getting married Saturday and my bridesmaids are staying with me this week. Just get the stuff out of it you need so we can spread out.” I realized I was a good two inches taller than Betts now. I didn’t exactly tower over her, but when I stood up, she had to look up at me. If I started a big row over this, I was sure Mom would come down on Betts’ side, just because it was a special occasion. But I wasn’t willing to roll over and play dead.
“Okay, Betts. I can sleep in your room this week. You know how I love your satin sheets.” She looked at me with her mouth working like a fish. Apparently, her college friends knew a little about her temperament and there were a couple oohs and a whistle.
“How do you know how he loves your satin sheets, Betts?” One asked. They were all laughing.
“You sleep in the guest room!” she shouted at me.
“Uh-uh. Even trade or no deal.”
“But…” Betts could see a losing battle when it was in front of her, but she was going to try to burn me anyway. “All right, but if you leave come stains all over them like the last time, you wash them yourself.” Oh shit! I was turning red.
“How about if I stay in there, too,” one of the girls said. I hadn’t been introduced to any of them. She was cute, but not that cute. “You know. Just to protect the sheets.” They were all laughing.
“Back off, girl,” Doreen said. “Brian is my date for the week and if anyone guards the sheets, it will be me.”
“I am?”
“Doreen! Isn’t it bad enough you corrupted your own brother without corrupting mine, too?” I fled. I got my clothes and underwear out of the attic and moved my things to protect them at the end of the room. I figured Princess Betts would sleep in my bed while her minions slept on the floor.
“Hurry up! We’re going out and need to get ready.”
I ran downstairs to Betts’ room to toss my things in and hide.
Betts and her girlfriends must have gotten in late because I was sound asleep when I woke up to someone kissing my forehead and then my cheeks. I thought it was Samantha at first and wondered how she’d managed to get into my bedroom. Then my eyes shot open and I sat up, almost knocking Doreen off the bed.
“Doreen? What are you doing in here?”
“Shh. May I slip into bed with you so we can talk quietly?”
“I’m not wearing anything!”
“I promise not to touch. I mean, with my skin. I’ve got pajamas on. Is that why you like Betts’ satin sheets?”
“These are just some old flannel sheets. I’ve never slept in Betts’ satin sheets.”
“Please let me lie down with you. I promise I just want to talk… and be held.” I lifted the sheet and she snuggled in beside me with her back to me. She pulled my arm around her and while I could feel her breasts beneath my wrist, it wasn’t a sexual thing. Apparently, she really did want to just cuddle and talk. “It’s hard to believe I’ve been out of high school a whole year now,” she sighed. “It seems like yesterday that Betts and I were clowning around and seeing each other every day. It was hard enough when she went to Purdue and I stayed here. We saw each other a couple times a month. But now… I know you don’t get along with your sister, Brian, but she’s my best friend and she’s getting married and moving to Seattle. I’ll never see her.” Doreen pulled my hand to her cheek and rubbed her tears against it. She was really hurting and it was the first time I really let it sink in that Betts was moving all the way across the country. How many times had I wished she’d move out and go away? Now it was really happening. I hugged Doreen.
“Brian? I meant what I said earlier,” she whispered after we’d cried ourselves out. “I want you to be my date for this week. Every event. If there’s trouble with transportation, I’ll drive you. I don’t want to be alone with any of them.”
“What’s wrong, Doreen? That doesn’t sound like you.”
“Don’t get me wrong. Allen is a good guy and treats Betts like the princess she is. But the frat brothers he has with him… We were all out this evening and it’s like they consider the bridesmaids their free lays for the week. At least Allen was nice enough to include you as one of the groomsmen. That way, even though we won’t walk down the aisle at the same time, there’s an excuse for me to partner with you the rest of the time. His best man is creepy.”
“I can’t believe they’d behave like that. I don’t know if I can go everywhere they will want to go, though. I’m only fifteen.”
“That’s perfect. I can’t go to a bar with them because my date can’t go.”
“Uh… Doreen. I hate to mention it, but you know there’s rules, right?”
“Yeah. Doug showed me the agreement, including the new amendments. That’s why I sat on the edge of the bed and waited for you to wake up instead of just crawling in with you. Naked.”
“Thank you. I don’t know that I could have handled that.”
“I agree to all the terms of the dating agreement.”
“Okay. I guess this works to my advantage, too. Betts is four years older than me, but Allen is seven years older and so are the rest of his buddies. This way I’ll have someone to pal around with.” We just stayed snuggled up in spoons with Doreen in front of me and she pulled my hand down so it was touching her breast. I had a predictable response.
“You know, I have a friendlier relationship with my brother than you have with Betts,” Doreen whispered. “We’ve always been able to just crawl into bed with each other when something was bothering us.”
“You’ve never… uh… never mind. I don’t want to know.”
“And I wouldn’t tell you,” Doreen answered. “But I know about how guys respond to girls. I’ve got more experience than Betts, but I haven’t done half of what she thinks I have. She uses her virginity like a club to keep Allen in line. He isn’t going to get her cherry until their wedding night. And I bet they’ll have baby number one exactly nine months from this Saturday.”
“I sure hope he knows what he’s in for.”
“He does. He absolutely dotes on her. He’d do anything for her even if she wasn’t holding out on him. But… I was never that way. I didn’t sleep with every boy I dated like everybody believed. But I did have a couple boyfriends I was with and had sex with. It was really good, too. I don’t regret any of it, even when I think of Betts and her intact cherry. Well, what I’m getting at is that I know what condition you’re in.” She flexed her ass cheeks and squeezed my cock between them. Then she started rubbing up and down against me. Her ass felt great, even through her pajama bottoms. “If you need relief, you can go ahead. I didn’t come into your bed to get you frustrated.” She turned the palm of my hand against her breast and encouraged me to squeeze while she rubbed against me. “Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
“Doreen,” I whispered. “Stop now, please. I didn’t let you get in bed with me to jack me off. Thank you, but I really don’t have to come every time I get hard. If I did, I’d spend all day in the bathroom. You are really sweet and… thank you. You should probably go to bed now. With the other girls.”
She rolled in my arms to face me and looked deep into my eyes. I felt like she was trying to mind-meld with me or something.
“Brian, this week while you are my date, I give you my explicit permission to touch me when you want to or need to in any way that the agreement allows and we are alone. I know I’m not one of your real girlfriends but let me be a temporary girlfriend. You are helping me, and as long as it is private and/or appropriate, I want you to have complete access to my body, mind, and soul.”
“It means that much to you?”
“Yes.” She slipped out of bed and stood next to me making quite a show of pulling her pajamas out of her crack. Then she turned back to me. “May I kiss my boyfriend goodnight?”
“Doreen, as long as it is private and/or appropriate, I give you the same permissions for this week.” She kissed me. When she finished, I was regretting not taking her up on her offer. In fact, once she was out of the room I made a liar of myself and rubbed one off into a handful of tissue.
I was up early, as usual, and the sleepy girls followed their noses down the stairs to the fresh cinnamon rolls. Dad grabbed one on his way to work, but Mom waited for the girls. She was taking the week off to keep the wedding on track.
“Mmm. These are good,” Betts’ dark-complected bridesmaid said. Amazing how Betts hadn’t bothered to introduce any of them to me. This one looked like she could be of some Arabic or Mediterranean heritage. Her eyes were like coal. “Are they Pillsbury?” I groaned.
“Would you believe my little brother actually makes these from scratch?” Betts said.
“No way. It would take hours.”
“It’s after eight-thirty,” I said. “I’ve been up since four-thirty.”
“Just for us?”
“No. Just because I like to cook.”
“Brian,” Mom said, “that reminds me. Don’t forget your interview with Bill and Crystal this afternoon. They said they’d be here at one.”
“Oh, wow! I forgot. I need to make a phone call.”
“Don’t take too long,” Betts commanded. “The florist is supposed to call this morning.” I wished I could just disappear for the week. Like the cinnamon rolls did. I didn’t even get one.
“Liz? Honey, I have to change our date. I have a job interview this afternoon.”
“Is this the thing with Courtney’s parents?”
“I didn’t think anyone knew.”
“Courtney let it slip at graduation yesterday. Brenda heard her and was all over her until she got the details. At least the details Courtney knew. When can we get together?”
“Well, I could come over this morning—like anytime now—but I’d have to be back in time to get a shower and clean clothes before they get here at one. Or we could postpone until tomorrow.”
“Can’t do that. You’ve got plans tomorrow.”
“I do?”
“Yeah. Come over right now. I can’t wait to see you.”
“But he’s supposed to go with the guys to get his tux this afternoon!” I heard Betts complaining to Mom as I grabbed my bike. This was one I wasn’t going to get in on. Mom wouldn’t let Betts conflict with my interview. I knew Bill and Crystal from several times meeting with the girls, even though it was usually Anna that brought them up. Still, I wanted to make a good impression. I was thinking of whipping up a light mid-afternoon snack for them and planned to do my Insalata Caprese. I’d been told not to fix anything in advance because we might want to go out to eat, but I knew I had plenty of butter and a can of clams. Mom had some white wine in the fridge. I could whip up a light dish of linguine and clam sauce in less than half an hour. The Caprese would be easy to do while the clams were sautéing. All that was on my mind when I wheeled my bike into Liz’s drive.
All that left my mind when Liz met me at the door.
She was wearing a pale green pair of panties that were cut high on the hips.
That was all.
I actually thought that after our riding date, my relationship with Liz was going to calm down a little and not be so risky. Seeing her like this, though, my cock ate my brain. She held a hand out and kept me at arm’s length.
“Brian, I give you explicit permission to look at me in any way you’d like. You can even tell me what position you want me in while you look at me. You can look at me as closely as you want. Look at any part of me. But you don’t have my permission to touch me. May I have the same permission, Brian?”
Permission to look but not touch? To look at anything? As closely as I want? If she can do the same? My head was short-circuiting. I was hard as a rock and thought I’d be able to hold Liz in my arms. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to restrain myself with her looking at me the way I was looking at her. It was a new game. Trust Liz to come up with something even more amazing than I’d ever thought of.
“I need you, Brian. I need you to look at me and tell me what you see.”
“Liz, my sweet, sweet Liz. You overwhelm me. For some reason the idea of you just looking at me is more… intimate… embarrassing… daring than anything I’ve ever imagined. I don’t know how to do this, but I give you explicit permission to look at me any way you’d like, but not touch. The same permission you gave me. Anything for you, Liz.”
“Um… Brian? I’ve got kind of a skinny ass but would you follow it to my bedroom? Please?”
I followed. Her ass was skinny compared to, say Brenda or Rose or especially Sugar. But just following it up the stairs to her bedroom was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Her hips flared beneath her tiny waist. Liz was still a good inch or two taller than me—nearly as tall as Jessica. She could probably do the same kind of modeling Jessica did. Except there weren’t many red haired and freckled models appearing on the covers of Seventeen or Mademoiselle or Cosmo. As I watched her legs work going up the stairs, I couldn’t imagine an ass that was more perfect.
Once in her room, Liz went to her bed and sat against the headboard. I started to sit beside her, but she pointed to the other end of the bed.
“First, you have to take off all your clothes but your undershorts, just like I have,” she said. I did as she said, thankful that I had a clean and fairly new pair of briefs on. Then I sat at the foot of the bed facing her.
“God, you’re beautiful, Liz. I don’t think I’ve ever sat where I could just look at you before.”
“Tell me what you see, Brian.” Damn! This was going to be tricky. Did she want me to describe her or tell her about what I saw every time I looked at her, whether she was naked or not? Well, she’d taken the trouble to get naked, or to not dress. Whatever.
“Liz, I see a girl who has been my friend since fifth grade. A girl that I’m really fond of and who I’d defend to my last breath. I see a girl I’ve been more intimate with than… about anyone else in my life. And I see all those physical attributes that make her breathtaking. I see her wild red hair that is the biggest clue to her wild personality. No matter how you try to tame it, it flies off in its own direction, listening to its own spirit. I see your pale skin, made more so by the riot of freckles that decorate it. I look at your freckles and think, ‘I wonder how many there are and how long it would take me to count them all.’ And I always think what fun it would be to try. I especially like that one larger freckle about half an inch above your right nipple. It’s like a guy stranded on a desert island waving a flag and yelling, ‘Look over here!’ And when I look, I see your beautiful, little breasts. I haven’t checked, but I’m pretty sure Whitney’s are smaller, just like she’s taller. Otherwise, they are the smallest breasts I’ve ever seen on an adult woman. It’s like they simply swelled up out of your heart when I looked at you. I want to hold them, kiss them, press them against my chest as we embrace. Sometimes—like now—your little nipples get so hard that they make dents in your shirts. Did you know that I always look when I see you? I see those little points poking your blouse out and I wonder, ‘What’s she thinking of?’ Maybe even, ‘Who is she thinking of?’ Or even, ‘Is she thinking of me?’ I always hope it’s the last.” I had to squeeze my eyes shut for a minute. It’s one thing to see another person, but when you have to describe her, it becomes so much more personal. My emotions almost wrecked me.
“Liz, when I look at your cheeks, I wonder if I was the one who made you blush. Was it me that caused that reddish flush to undermine the freckles on your arms? Long, beautiful arms that I know are strong because I’ve felt them lock me to you. Yet they are so elegant and ethereal. I wonder if you have elfin blood in your veins. I see your ribs and stomach and sometimes I worry that you aren’t getting enough to eat. I wonder if you will ever gain a layer of fat over the muscle that ripples across your stomach. I don’t worry that you are too thin, though. It’s obvious that you are healthy and vibrant and full of life. I can even see the muscles over your tummy vibrating with… what is that? Desire?”
“Stop, Brian! Stop and let me catch my breath.” Tears were streaming from her eyes and I wanted to reach out and hold her, but I’d promised. “You… you really think I’m beautiful?”
“Oh yes, Liz. I’m not going to lie to you and say you are the most beautiful woman in the world. You wouldn’t believe me if I said it and I’d feel like a fool. But that you are the most beautiful Liz that can ever be? I believe that. I believe you shine with beauty and it makes me so happy that I get to see it.”
She panted for a moment, closed her eyes, and caught her breath. The flush started to fade. I just waited.
“My turn,” she said. “I look at you and I still see the boy I loved in first grade. You probably don’t even remember when Mrs. Chapman re-arranged the seats the second week of school. She put me in the back of the room because I was tall and I cried because I couldn’t sit beside you. I sat beside you all through kindergarten. Do you remember that?” I remembered so little about that time. Feeling so alone and as if I had no friends. Had Liz been my friend and I didn’t realize it? “But I see more than that boy. I see how he grew up. I see straight dark brown hair sticking up all over your head when Whitney styled it with that icky gel. I see sharp blue eyes, made slightly bigger by the lenses of the glasses you used to wear before you got contacts. I think those eyes must be like Superman’s x-ray vision, except they see into your soul. I could never lie to those eyes. I see a face that used to be so round and chubby but is lean and smooth now. I wonder if you shave every day or if your face, like some Native American’s, simply doesn’t grow hair.” I kept thinking that any day now, I’d have to shave. I was sure I’d have to eventually. But I kept my mouth shut.
“You might think this is weird, but girls think about nipples just like boys do. Whenever I think about you sucking on my nipples, I think I’d like to do that to you. They’re so tiny. The whole thing isn’t as big as a quarter and I know when I look at you like this that the little tips get as hard as mine do.” Liz’s fingers brushed her nipples and I found myself unconsciously reflecting her. That light caress of fingers across nipples sent a shiver down my spine. “I love it when we hold each other and I feel your nipples pressed against mine. I’m not much bigger than you are.” I moaned a little as Liz wiggled out of her panties and motioned for me to do the same. Her red hair was curly and sparse. My dark hair was just a tangled bush around the base of my cock—a cock that was straining the limits of hardness. Liz spread her legs but didn’t touch herself. Still, I could see her juices, freed from the panties, begin to flow out of her and down her butt. “I’m going to have to wash my bedding when we’re done,” she giggled. “But I planned for that.” I’d wondered about the fact there were just sheets on her bed and no blankets.
“You’re beautiful, Liz. I’ve never seen anything like what you are showing me. Just looking at you has me so on edge I’m afraid I’ll spurt all over.”
“You know me,” she answered. “I’m ready to go off all the time. Looking at your hard cock makes me want to feel it pumping its seed inside me. Look how my juices are running to make it all slippery for you. I broke my hymen playing with myself a couple years ago. There would be no obstruction to you just sliding in all the way until our short hairs got tangled with each other and your pubic bone was rubbing against my clit.” We both squeezed our eyes shut, concentrating on not coming. I opened my eyes and saw tears leaking from hers.
“That’s what I really see when I look at you, Brian. Remember the first time we got together and I said it would be okay to fuck me? You said I should save myself for someone I love—someone I care about—and not just for a fuck buddy. When I look at you, I see that person. Don’t worry. I don’t expect you to see exactly the same thing. I don’t even see us doing that whole get married and have a dozen kids thing that I talked about. But when you look at me, I know that you do love me a little and that you care for me a lot. We’d never be sitting on my bed naked if you didn’t. You’d never let yourself use me just to get off, and I don’t think you’d let me use you, either. It will be twenty-two-and-a-half months until I’m seventeen and sometime that summer, I want you to undress like me, just like we are now. Only then I want to lie back and open my legs for you to put your cock in me. Brian, I no longer want to fuck you. I want to make love with you until we can’t see straight. I don’t expect to be your first or your only or even your forever. But I want to show you with all my body… exactly… what I see… when I look… at you.”
Liz was panting, still stroking her nipples and down her stomach toward her pussy that was just flowing with her juices. She never touched her clitoris but looking me straight in the eye from four feet away, she slid down, threw her head back, and came. Hard. And while she was coming, I saw my semen splatter against her stomach and her legs. A streak landed across that curly red pubic hair.
I hadn’t even touched myself.
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