The Agreement
33 Sudden Exposure
LIONEL AND ELAINE crammed themselves into the back of Sarah’s car using the same method I’d used with Whitney, even though it was a four-door. This time, it was Lionel spread out across the back of the seat and Elaine pretty much lying on top of him. I don’t think they bothered with seatbelts, but the moaning and kissing in the back seat was distracting to say the least. Sarah had the car started by the time I got around to the passenger side and I noticed that she’d hiked her dress up above her knees. She’d switched out of her heels and into tennis shoes while Elaine and Lionel were getting themselves into the back. I guess I kind of stared. Bare legs that have been covered all night? Crap! Sarah took my left hand and guided it to her leg. It wasn’t like it was way up on her leg—just a little above the knee.
“That will keep my dress from falling down and getting tangled in the pedals,” she whispered. It was really a lot more intimate than I expected our date to get. Her leg was so soft and I could feel the muscles tense and relax as she stepped on the gas or moved to the brake. We got our passengers to Elaine’s house where originally the limo was going to drop them. I got out and held the door for Elaine. She sort of fell into my arms with her heels in one hand.
“Pick me up. Pick me up! The gravel hurts my feet.” I scooped the little redhead up in my arms and she planted a huge kiss on me. “Oops. May I have permission to do what I just did? Again?”
“Yes,” I laughed. “Until Lionel hands me my ass on a platter.” He was still struggling to get out of the car. Elaine kissed me again, but not in a big sloppy way.
“Thank you, little brother boyfriend. You’re the best. But now I’m going with my other boyfriend. So please hand me off so he can carry me to my car. I have to have him home by two.” Lionel grinned at me as I deposited Elaine into his arms. “Mmm. I think I need a few more boyfriends so I never have to walk anyplace. You can all just carry me wherever I want to go,” she laughed. I watched as Lionel held her and she fumbled for her keys. He had to kneel down so she could reach the door lock and it took a couple tries before he managed to get in the right position to put her into the car without hitting her head. We were all laughing and trying not to be too loud. You’d think we’d been drinking. Everything just seemed funny. Well, that was probably because of Elaine. I slid back in the car and Sarah immediately pulled my hand back to her knee as we headed out.
When we got to her house, everything was dark except the entry light. I was glad. I just wanted to hold Sarah a little more and as much as I liked Brighty and Evelyn and loved Hannah, I was relieved not to have a welcoming committee. It was only one-thirty, so we slipped downstairs. My overnight bag was sitting next to the sofa.
“I had such a good time tonight!” she said. “I never thought I’d go to prom. Thank you so much.”
“Sarah, there’s just no way I can even begin to say how much fun I had and how glad I am you asked me to go with you.”
“I didn’t ask, you goof!” she laughed. “It’s… uh… only one-thirty. I liked kissing you on the dance floor. Could we… would you mind… if we sat on the sofa and sort of kissed a little more?”
“Girlfriend, I’d love that. You are really a sweet kisser.” I took off my jacket and Sarah pulled off my tie and cummerbund before I settled onto the sofa. She curled up next to me and I folded her into my arms as we kissed. Sweet was exactly what I meant. Not just that she tasted sweet, but even though our kisses grew sort of passionate, they were still gentle and teasing.
“Bri? You could touch my breasts a little if you want to,” Sarah whispered to me. I almost let my hand get ahead of my brain.
“Honey, I promised you that I wouldn’t do that even if you asked. Please don’t make it any harder.”
“It’s been kind of hard all evening, hasn’t it?” she giggled. She was leaning against me in such a way that she was still in contact with my cock. “Thank you. I’m sorry I sort of lost control. I’m not completely inexperienced. I know I act like a good girl most of the time, but I’ve felt a boy’s erection pressed against me before. Just never for so long or with a boy I like so much,” she whispered. “I’ll behave if you’ll just kiss me some more.” I did and we both behaved, but things got a little blurry and somewhere along the line I realized that we’d both dozed off a little and I came awake looking down at that sleeping angel in my arms. My hands were still on her delectable bare shoulders.
That’s when I realized there was something wrong. We’d left the stairway light on so we weren’t completely in the dark and as a result I could see her pretty clearly. Her lips were slightly parted, just like I’d left them the last time we kissed and I wanted to touch them again. But Sarah had rolled slightly away from me and sometime while we were making out or sleeping or something, the top of her dress had slid down and her left nipple was exposed. Oh man. So pretty. Her breasts weren’t big. Well, bigger than Whitney and Liz, maybe, but not even as big as Renee’s. It was perfectly round and the dark spot that was exposed was maybe as big as a quarter with a very hard pea-sized bump in the middle. I wanted to just lower my lips and kiss it.
I’d promised no sexual touching and even though this wasn’t touching and was an accident, I sort of felt like a voyeur and that made me feel a little sick. I didn’t want to wake her up and embarrass her, but I couldn’t just leave her hanging out like that. I carefully moved my right hand down and tried to get hold of a little fabric so I could tug it back up. It was more difficult than I thought because it wasn’t just one layer of fabric, of course, there was an under layer that was the part that was supposed to hold the dress up and the elastic was under her boob.
“Uh… Brian?” Oh shit! Sarah was awake and looking up at me. “What are you doing?”
“Sarah!” I panicked. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to do anything. Honest. Your dress kind of slipped while we were sleeping and I was trying… I didn’t want you to… I’m sorry, Sarah. Really, I wasn’t trying to touch you.” She looked down where I still had a bit of fabric caught in my fingers.
“Oh.” She reached up and took my hand and laced her fingers through mine. She held it against her waist. “Thank you.” She snuggled back against me and went back to sleep.
She hadn’t pulled her dress back up, and if anything, there was more of it exposed and I could even see her right nipple over the edge of her dress. And she was asleep in my arms. My left hand was around her back and holding her bare shoulder and my right hand was held in hers against her waist. I didn’t even know if she’d fully realized she was exposed. But she had to. It wasn’t that warm in the house. Witness the two hard nubs that were pointing up at me. I couldn’t move and wouldn’t have if I could. I had no idea what time it was or how long I stared at her bare breasts before I finally dozed back to sleep.
“Naughty sister,” I heard Hannah whisper. My eyes flicked open and I saw her kneeling on the floor in front of us whispering in Sarah’s ear. Whispering, but loud enough that I heard it, too. “Look at you, lying naked in our boyfriend’s arms. You are such a naughty prom date.” She kissed Sarah on the cheek and Sarah’s eyes fluttered open. I couldn’t believe she was still lying in my arms with her top mostly pooled around her waist. The neat braid around her head had come undone and her hair hung against her shoulder. She smiled at her sister.
“I’m a wicked Jezebel, aren’t I?” Sarah whispered to her sister. She returned the kiss to Hannah’s cheek.
“Yes. But you’d better go to bed before anyone else gets up and finds you draped across him like you’ve just been ravished.”
“I wasn’t. He never touched me.” She started to straighten up and kissed me lightly as she did. She let go of my hand and slowly pulled her dress back up into its proper position. I was really sad to see them disappear. Sarah kissed me again. “Thank you. ’Night.” She headed toward the stairs. Hannah didn’t. Hannah, in her cream-colored silk pajamas got on the sofa and curled up in almost the exact same position her sister had just left.
“My turn,” she said.
“Are you sure, Honey?” I asked. “What if we fall asleep and someone finds us?”
“It’s okay. She’s really pretty, isn’t she?”
“Sarah? She’s beautiful.”
“Do you think I’ll ever be that pretty?”
“Hannah? You know you’re that pretty. You practically look like twins. I mean, not that I’ve seen you exactly like she was,” I sputtered.
“Except when you watched me dress at the sleepover.”
“You knew I was watching, too, didn’t you? You looked right at me.”
“I guess I’m a little naughty, too. I knew you couldn’t really see anything. My sister was watching, too.”
“She was?”
“And I think Rose had her eyes open. She was kind of preoccupied, though.”
“I don’t think I understand what just happened, or what happened then, either,” I sighed. “Sometimes, I wish…” I wasn’t going to say it. I wished Hannah was my only girlfriend and that we were doing all the stuff I did with the others sometimes. I wanted to lie naked in bed with her and be her lover. She was tender and funny and kind, but it just didn’t seem she was interested in anything but being friends. She’d be fifteen in a couple of months, but the other girls had been showing some interest for a year before they turned fifteen. Did people really develop at such radically different speeds?
“Why do boys like girls’ breasts?”
“What? Well, they turn us on, I guess.”
“But why? I mean, I know the biological imperative stuff and all the association with reproduction. But you were out with Sarah all evening and she wore a dress that came all the way down to here.” She held her hand at the middle of her chest. Yeah, that was about how far it came down until we went to sleep. “But it wasn’t naughty until her nipples poked out,” Hannah continued. She started unbuttoning my shirt, carefully collecting the studs and putting them on the coffee table.
“Look. You’ve got nipples,” she said pulling my shirt open. “Nobody cares if a boy shows his nipples. You do it at the pool or the lake or even playing basketball when you play shirts and skins. I used to think it was just because girls get a bunch of fat under their nipples, but we can wear teeny tiny bikini tops so you can see all the fat, but still what everybody wants to see is the nipple. Your nipple looks just about the same as mine.” Hannah pulled her pajama shirt open and examined her breast and looked at mine. Oh Christ! She’s showing me her breasts, just like Sarah did. Was this whole thing just play-acting? Was Hannah beginning to get interested in sexual things?
“Hannah. Please. I don’t know what to say or what to do. You are showing me your breast and it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I just want to look at you and touch you and kiss you and I know you don’t want all that stuff. What are you trying to do to me? I don’t know what to do.” I was trembling all over and was afraid I’d either cry or come or both. Hannah closed her shirt and rebuttoned it.
“I’m sorry, Brian. I guess I’m a little naughty like my sister. I just thought you’d like to see it and it didn’t really do anything to me. I mean, you are my best friend, Brian. My best friend ever. I feel bad sometimes that I don’t like any of the things that boys and girls like together. I feel bad because it’s like I can’t be all the stuff you want me to be and I could do this and it didn’t make me feel icky or anything, but I didn’t know it would make you all upset. I didn’t think you were that upset when Sarah showed you.”
“Oh, believe me, I had moments of being upset because I promised her I wouldn’t do anything sexual with her and then it looked like it was all an accident and I was a voyeur and I wanted to cover her up so she’d have her modesty. But that was all because I’m really just a teenager and that’s the way I respond to stimuli that have been part of everything I know for all my life. Or maybe I’m just a sicko.”
“I understand that boys respond to girls just because we’re there,” Hannah said. “When we are playing in the pool or the lake, I know that Carl and Doug and Josh and Geoff and Lionel all get erections just like you do. When we’re riding double and I feel your erection up against my butt, I don’t care. I figure, it’s just part of who you are. It even would have been okay that one time when you were rubbing against my leg. I just don’t understand what the feeling is.”
“Hannah, don’t you ever feel… um… sexy? I mean, like masturbate or anything?”
“I know all about masturbation. And I tried that, but I just didn’t care. Maybe there’s something wrong with my nerves. Except I could feel everything and my body responded the way the books say it should, I guess. It just didn’t mean anything to me.”
“Hannah, I love you so much that I’m sad we can’t share that with each other. But maybe it’s just getting older or something.”
“Yeah. I have a fully functioning female body that bleeds every month, so in most cultures I’d be acknowledged as a mature, child-bearing age adult. But I feel like I’ve got the emotional maturity of a ten-year-old. Brian? I know someplace deep down that I love you. I know that someday in the early morning like this, in our special time when I always feel so close to you, that we’ll be making love and we’ll both like it. I’d let you do things now if you really want to. If it would make you happy to touch my breasts and even to kiss me, I’d let you. I just… I don’t…”
“Hannah!” I hugged her to me felt her hot face against my chest. “Honey, I promise you that I will never do anything to you just because it makes me feel good. I will wait as long as it takes—forever—to have that special moment with you when it means the same to both of us. I promise you, Hannah. When we’re a hundred years old you’ll be able to say, ‘I know he still loves me.’
“No matter what, I'll still love you. I promise.”
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