Guardian Angel
9 Scarred for Life
OF COURSE, when you are thirteen going on fourteen, you don’t have that much control over your summer. Rose took it upon herself to organize a skating party the first of August so we could all get together and we decided to try to get our parents to agree to a Labor Day party at Crystal Lake again. Rose and I held hands while we skated, but we never got a chance to try kissing again.
And Rose really didn’t want a boyfriend. She skated with a couple of the other boys who were there and I held hands with a couple other girls as we skated. Even with Brenda. That was interesting. They lowered the lights a little and turned on the mirror ball in the middle of the rink so little light flashes went around the space. I wasn’t all that great a skater, but I could do it without falling down. It still surprised me when Brenda pulled my right hand around her waist and we held our left hands together as we skated. She was still a few inches taller than me, but I was sure I was going to make five feet soon. She leaned into me so she could talk over the music without shouting.
“I’m your buddy, Brian. But we’ve got to find you a girlfriend. School is going to be so much fun this year!”
Well, that was her opinion.
I went to a long weekend at Starbridge Dude Ranch and got to show my skill at barrel racing. Dad delivered my papers for me and Mom collected on Saturday. Of course, I gave them the income that week. Dad said he could use a little spending money and thanked me.
“Good morning, Hal,” I said when I walked into the barn on Saturday morning. “Need any help brushing down the horses?”
“Well, now. I remember the face, but what was the name? Forgive an old man,” Hal said.
“Brian Frost. I was here for a week last summer. Wish I had more than a weekend this year.”
“Oh, yes. Newspaper carrier who knows how to ride barrels. You have your own horse, right?”
“Yeah. We won barrels in our age group last summer at the fair. She’s getting a little old and is slowing down, though.”
“And why are you out so early in the morning?” He tossed me a currycomb and I started in on the horse he had tethered in the aisle.
“I get up every morning between four-thirty and five. To deliver papers. I figured I could make myself useful.”
“What do you want to learn this weekend?”
“Well, I’ve completed Western Horsemanship and Pleasure Riding in 4-H . I’d like to learn rescue. They had it in the junior rodeo at the fair last year.”
“Theresa will teach you. You’re doing a good job grooming. Move on to Jubal. Be sure to check his hooves. I thought that right front shoe might be loose.”
“I like brushing the horses. Sometimes after a hard ride on the paper route in the morning, I go out to the barn just to brush Silk and cool down. It’s almost like she talks to me. We don’t ride much in the winter, but I go out every day and brush her down. Rika, too.”
“Horses are like that. They know just what you need when you need it.”
I got to help out a lot at the ranch and Theresa taught me how to ride the rescue barrels. When the kids from the inner-city camp who were out there were watching our little horseshow, Theresa rescued me off the barrel and it was a blast. Turns out she’s a state champion barrel racer and former pro. And really cute!
Silk and I didn’t run rescue at the junior rodeo at the fair the next week, but we got second in pole bending. I was just there to have fun.
I used some of my earnings from my paper route and some scrip at Goldblatt’s Department Store to get a big fan that I took to the attic. With it blowing air through the dormer windows, it was tolerable enough that I could spend more time in my laboratory.
Up in the attic, I learned a lot about making compounds and testing for different elements. I looked in my new Edmunds catalog and ordered a bunch of stuff so I had a lot to experiment with in my lab. Betts wouldn’t come to the attic to bug me. She said it was too hot and gross and all sorts of other disgusting things. I liked it up there and decided to ask Dad if I could move my bedroom to the attic.
I’d been in my lab for about two hours in the morning and just felt I needed a break. I was thinking I’d go for a walk in the woods, but somehow that just brought back memories of Cassie and I started feeling sorry for myself. I headed where I always went when I was feeling sorry for myself. The barn. I’d get a little hay for the girls and call them in to brush them.
I poked my head up through the trap and almost fell back down through it. “Oh shit!” My sister had her shirt off and Eric had his pants down. She was… Crap! She had her mouth on his dick. At least, when I first saw her. She jumped and Eric cringed like she’d bit him. She spun around looking at me wildly, not even thinking to cover up. Betts screamed.
“Get out of here, pervert! Go away. Shit shit shit.” Eric was pulling his pants up as I dropped down out of the hole and ran to the house. I glanced back toward the barn when I got to the back door and Eric was headed toward his car. He peeled out all the way up our gravel drive. Betts came out of the barn holding her shirt together with one hand. I went into the house and ran to the attic. Oh crap!
My heart was racing a mile a minute. I collapsed on my rug and just lay there panting, thinking of what I’d seen. Crap! Crap! Crap! For being such a bitch, Betts had really nice boobs. They just stood up from her chest with big rosy nipples sticking out from them. That sticky facts of life book didn’t seem quite so disgusting all of a sudden. Crap!
I heard her run to her room and slam the door. She was crying. I didn’t know what to do.
I was scarred for life. I just knew the next time I did it, I’d be seeing my sister’s boobs. My sister’s nice boobs. Great boobs. I wonder if Rose’s boobs look like that. My sister is a girl! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Oh Crap!
I finally managed to settle down a little. What a terrible experience.
Now that I was thinking a little more calmly, I wondered what she was thinking. Damn, she must be scarred for life, too. Maybe that was the first time she’d given a blowjob and her little brother walks in on her. She’d be looking over her shoulder to see if I was there every time she ever sucked a cock. I actually felt kind of sorry for her.
The more I thought about it, the more I figured she’d really make my life hell now. I only had one chance to make it through my teens with my balls. I had to go apologize to her. I know I wasn’t doing anything wrong, but if she walked in on me like that I’d sure the hell want her to apologize. I took a deep breath and went downstairs.
Her door was closed. I walked right up to it and raised my hand to knock when I heard her. She was still crying. God, I felt like a shit. I almost turned around and left but I’m no coward. Face the music. Let her scream. Offer to do her chores for the rest of the summer. Whatever it takes. I knocked.
“Go away!”
“Betts, can I please talk to you for a minute? Please?” My voice cracked and I felt a tear on my own cheek. Crap! The door cracked open and she looked out.
“What?”
“Betts, I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to ruin your afternoon. I didn’t mean to see anything. I didn’t know. Please don’t be mad at me.” There was no question that I was crying now. Betts was, too.
“Oh crap! You little perv.” The door opened and Betts hugged me. My sister hugged me. I should run and take a shower. But it was nice. “It wasn’t your fault. I was so stupid. I shouldn’t have been there or doing that. You must think I’m… filthy.”
“No Betts. That’s not true. I know we don’t get along much, but I still love you. You’re my sister.”
I must have said the wrong thing because she really started bawling then. She turned and went to sit on her bed. I didn’t know what to do. Leave? Stay? Wait? What would I want? As soon as I asked that question of myself, I knew what to do. I sat on the bed beside her and put my arm around her.
“Betts, it’s okay. It was just an accident. I won’t tell anybody. Honest.”
“I’m a crappy sister, aren’t I?” she asked. I didn’t know what to say. “Please don’t answer. I don’t want you to lie to me and I couldn’t take hearing the truth. I know what I am and that I make your life miserable. I don’t know why I do the things I do.”
“I don’t know any brother and sister that get along any better than we do. Look at Jessica and Drew. He tried to sell her.”
“Doreen and Doug do. Now I guess you got the same education she gave him.”
“Huh?”
“Oh shit. I shouldn’t have said that,” she said.
I laughed, and responded, “I knew his sister told him she’d show him everything he needed to know, but I didn’t know she actually had.” My sister choked on a laugh.
We sat there for a minute and I just kept my arm around her shoulders and she leaned on me a little. I’d never felt this close to my sister. Maybe it wasn’t all bad.
“I heard you saved Jessica from getting raped last spring. I don’t know why nobody here said anything. I found out from Doreen who found out from Doug who found out from Carl’s brother Bill.” I didn’t know what to say. I never told anyone. Geez. How many people knew it now?
“I just tried to help. She got them with her bottle.” I was sticking to the official story.
“Yeah. Right. Like Jessica would carry around a bottle of ammonia. Nobody believes that. You were brave and took down two guys who were almost twice your size.”
“Well, they weren’t that big.”
“Thank you,” she whispered. I was really confused now.
“I guess you’re welcome. I didn’t do it for you, exactly. Betts, they grabbed hold of her and I heard her scream. What else could I do?” I hadn’t seen Jessica all summer because she was away at modeling school and I heard she actually had a couple jobs as well.
“I mean, thank you for saving me, too.”
“I…”
“Shh. I shouldn’t have been out there. I shouldn’t have let Eric convince me. And then start undressing me. I wish you’d come five minutes sooner. At least I wouldn’t have had his thing in my mouth. Brian, he wanted to… go all the way. I was scared. I thought if I sucked him, he’d go away. I’m so ashamed.”
“Betts, you mean you weren’t like, willing?”
“Oh, Jesus Fucking Christ!” I caught my breath. I’d never heard Betts swear. And to take the name of the Lord in vain. No way. “I’m so confused,” she complained. “I was excited and I wanted to have him touch me and kiss me and stuff, but I didn’t intend to get naked or to let him… put his… in my…”
“I wish I’d sprayed him with ammonia.”
“It was my fault. I took him to the hayloft. I let him do those things. I’m just really lucky you came along today. You haven’t been going out there much this summer.”
“I’m glad I was there. Look, Betts, if you told me you wanted to finish and I spoiled things for you I’d never quit apologizing. But if you didn’t want to be doing what you were doing, that’s the same as what the Kowalskis were doing to Jessica. It isn’t your fault.”
“I’m not going to date him again. I might not date anyone. My reputation is going to get trashed. I can just hear him telling all the guys about how I gave him a blowjob, even if he didn’t finish and I bit him.”
“What kind of a guy would talk about that?”
“You really don’t know? Guys brag even if nothing happened. Don’t be like that, Brian. Please?”
“I’m not like that. I would never force a girl to do something she didn’t want to anyway. Not that I’ll ever have a chance with a girl. Who would want to date the class runt?”
“You’re a little guy, but you’ve got a big heart, Brian. I’m gonna take a shower now. The hayloft is all yours. Forever. I’m not going up there except to get hay. Thank you for saving me, little brother.”
“You’re welcome, big sister.” That was as close to an endearment as we’d ever had. I got up and headed for the door, but some devil in me made me stop and turn to look at her. “Betts? You’ve got really nice boobs.” She threw a pillow at me and I ran to the attic. Fortunately, she was laughing.
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