1/14/24
The Difference Between Erotica and Porn
This is number forty-five in the blog series, “My Life in Erotica.” I encourage you to join my Patreon community to support my writing.
WHEN I STARTED writing this blog in March of 2023, I was reading Rachel Kramer Bussel’s book How to Write Erotica. At the time, I accepted her definition of erotica: Writing that is intended to arouse. Now, I think it’s time to refine the definition.
First, there is such a wide range of material that is intended to arouse that the definition loses impact. Pornography is intended to arouse. Soft romantic poetry is intended to arouse. Fiery political speeches are intended to arouse. There are different kinds of arousal and we can start by refining the definition to ‘writing that is intended to sexually arouse the reader.’
Still not good enough, because readers become aroused by different things. For one person it might be a description of a woman’s breasts rising and falling with each breath as she talks about the love of her life. Another person might only be aroused by explicit descriptions of what is felt as the penis slowly enters the receptive folds of a woman’s vagina. Others might not be aroused by any written words, but instead require pictures. The intent to arouse is important, but not exclusive.
In this post, I’m interested in the difference between pornography and erotica. Many sources attempt to define that difference with varying degrees of success. The Encyclopedia Britannica says, “The distinction between pornography (illicit and condemned material) and erotica (which is broadly tolerated) is largely subjective and reflects changing community standards.”
In the Britannica’s terms, the sexual element in erotica is part of the larger aesthetic element. It is recognized as art, where in pornography, sexual arousal is its main purpose, even if it has some literary merit.
In my earliest erotic writings, I explored a lot of different sensual images. In Rhapsody Suite, for example, Tony’s growing circle of girlfriends has a sleepover. In a parody of a parlor game, the girls decide to hold a kissing contest, in which the objective is for a blindfolded Tony to guess which girl belongs to each kiss. I wrote some 3,000 words of Tony attempting to analyze each kiss and guess which of the eight girls had delivered it. I consider it to be one of the most arousing scenes I’ve ever written. And it has no sex in it!
The entire “Model Student” series of six books is now available at Bookapy. Rhapsody Suite is volume two in the series. In an effort to make it more accessible, I’ve created a collection of the six books so they can be downloaded either one at a time or as the full collection at a discount.
Over the past eleven years as a writer of erotica, I have often struggled to get the right balance between arousal and aesthetic. I still find the balance difficult to achieve, as reader tastes also change over time.
In last week’s blog, I hit on one of the differences between men’s and women’s outlook on the subject and I realized I’d really identified my own aesthetic. In erotica, we deal with the people involved. In pornography, we deal with the body parts involved.
I understand that might realign the definition of some of my own writing from erotic to pornographic. I’m sure I’ll come up with ways to justify it, but for now, I’d like to explore the distinction and see if it holds together.
Sex is a normal part of relational development. When the story is about that relationship, the sex—even when it is explicit—tends to be more erotic. It embraces the emotional, mental, and physical experience of the people involved. The sexual activity is a part of the relationship, but is not the exclusive focal point.
A story that is ‘about sex,’ however ignores the relationship perspective. It embraces the physical experience without paying more than peripheral attention to the emotional or mental experience. In porn, we are focused on the body parts involved in reaching an orgasm. We tend to treat them as separate from the whole person.
I believe this is a significant feature of pornographic video. There is usually very little story development. The pizza delivery guy shows up and the customer confesses she has no money, but suggests she could pay with her body. It takes about six lines of dialog before the two are naked and fucking. The camera focuses on her breasts, her mouth as she fellates him, her vagina as he penetrates her. Then it’s all about changing positions so the camera can get a better view. In each position, the participants will make sure the hair is out of the way, the hands don’t block the camera, and an ‘open’ position is maintained. Finally, the come will be sprayed where it is visible. The intent is not the pleasure of the actors, but the pleasure of the viewer.
When it comes down to it, erotica gives a much more realistic view of life, because it deals with the whole relationship. I’m not saying that the pizza delivery guy never tags the customer, but if the frequency were anything like what is portrayed in porn, there would be lines of males waiting to become pizza delivery guys. The number of stepbrothers and stepsisters who get involved with each other is nowhere near what is portrayed in porn. How many women in real life kiss another woman and suddenly realize they’re lesbians?
The focus on the genitals in porn makes the situations much less common than they are portrayed. Whereas every developing relationship has erotic elements that strike home with the reader. He’s so sweet to help her like that and take care of her. Of course she’ll become attracted to him! Maybe he’d like cookies.
Pornography includes stories intended to arouse by focusing on sex acts and genitalia. Erotica includes stories intended to arouse by focusing on relationships that may include sex as a part of the development.
Now, if I could apply that to what I’m writing, I’d be much better off!
An editor’s note to me after reviewing this post: “You know, this topic could easily fill a couple large books, right?”
My response was: “Yes. They’re called The United States Statutes at Large.”
I’m not through dealing with pornography vs. erotica, but I don’t plan to attempt to redefine the legal code or thousands of pages of judicial rulings. We’ll get a little deeper each time.
I was asked this week about writing from the perspective of the opposite gender. Yes, I have written books with a female protagonist rather than a male, and it is very difficult. Next week, I’ll deal with “Capturing the Character.” I’ll especially deal with capturing the character of a person of the opposite sex.
Please feel free to send comments to the author at devon@devonlayne.com.
